You have this moment. You have now. The past is behind you. The future, too far to see. Bring yourself into this day, this hour, this moment. Notice your breath. What can you see, feel, hear, touch, smell. Ground yourself in the awareness that you exist, you matter. You are choosing to read my blog. You are seeking from me some words that may help, comfort, amuse, or maybe inspire. But my words are just simple ones, and what I am advocating for here requires only your presence. Be present. Be present. Be present.
We have a tendency to relive the mistakes of our past. We have a knack for living in the anxiety of what the future holds. Let go of that. You have no control over that. That is an illusion, and involves either denial or pretense. You certainly can't change the past, but you can let it go. You certainly can't control the future, so try trusting that it will be okay. What you have a say in is right now. Take a deep breath. Enjoy the warmth or cold of your drink. Actually pay attention to its taste, or if you're not drinking anything, stop reading and close your eyes and listen for a minute.
What did you hear? How do you feel? Focus on what is, let go of what if or what was. We torture ourselves with guilt or shame. We bring back the spectors of the past into our daily lives as if doing this to ourselves makes any sense. It doesn't. "But Robbie, I have to think about those things so I don't repeat those mistakes ever again." Really? You don't think that lessson, or that apology, or that feeling of guilt hasn't already been attended to? It has. Guilt and shame should only be used as instructive feelings to change behavior or learn a lesson. They should not be carried for one single moment beyond that. They are destructive, depressive, and harmful feelings to our souls. Let them go.
The future is unknown. We have a huge problem with the unknown, mainly because it represents something beyond our control. So, in our fear, we try to be prepared for that which there is no preparation for. I have clients worried about their kids college careers when they are still in grade school. I have clients who become completely overwhelmed before they get out of bed, certain that the day ahead of them will be too much. Fear equals paralysis and disconnects us from the now. It also is a useless feeling when it comes to the future because whatever is going to happen will happen. The tragic irony is people who spend, let's say, 90% of their lives preparing for these potential tragedies or maladies will never face them. It is just wasted energy and takes them out of the present. Life should be lived in the present. Other than warm memories, healthy nostalgia, or inspired visions, time spent in the past or future insures one thing. You are missing the present.
And the importance here works two ways. If things are going well, allow yourself to soak in your blessings. Feel the comfortable bed or chair you sit in as you read this. Note the house you live in, the food in your refrigerator, the eyes that allow you to even read these words. The blessings, when we are fully conscious, are endless. However, if you are in pain, if life is not where you want it to be or envisioned it would be at this point, here is the encouragment. You have control over this moment. You have control over the next thought you allow to occupy your time. Let the bad ones go. Focus on what you have control over. It isn't the past or future. If something needs to change, you can change it. If you temporarily can't change it, you can control how you react to it. You have more power than you realize. And your power rests in the now, in what is.
